Why?
I've always felt that this was the most important of the interrogatives of journalism (or life in general). Sure the other four W's (and one H) all matter in their own ways, but "why" goes beyond simple logistics and demands answers that touch on everything from science to psychology; mathematics to metaphysics. "Why" is also an intensely personal question and is shaped, much as people are, by a combination of nature and nurture. With as many potential explanations as there are permutations of genetics and environment, the question is often the most difficult to answer in a way that is both comprehensive and relevant.
As an example, take any simple hobby you may enjoy and try explaining why that particular pursuit speaks to you. It may be easy to say "I love to spend my free time sitting a recliner and reading a good Western novel." In one sentence you can convey the who (I), what (leisure/hobby), when (free time), where (recliner), and how (reading). But now ask the "why" and see how convoluted such a simple task becomes. Do you read because you enjoy the quiet time? Is it an exercise in stress relief - an escape from the pressures of everyday life? Do you live vicariously through the characters to break monotony and routine? Perhaps you are an armchair historian with a passion for the stories of the Old West? Or maybe you read them because your grandfather read them, and you like to feel a connection through a common activity? The answer could be one of these, or a million other possibilities, or it could be an intricate combination as unique as the person in question. Accordingly, just knowing yourself and your "why" is extremely difficult, and in many situations becomes the source of crises of identity.
The question of why we do things is further complicated by the need to communicate our motives to others. Humans are social creatures, and much of what we perceive as meaningful is given credence, or at the very least context, through our interactions with others. However, there are three major hurtles that must be overcome before two or more people can share meaning. First, as already mentioned, the person doing the sharing must have a reasonable understanding of why they choose to do something. Second, they must be able to effectively communicate their choice to the receiver. Finally, the receiver must be able to reconcile that information with their own knowledge, experiences, and personal ideology. Some people just can't communicate because they lack the proper skills: they speak different languages, possess a different lexicon, or have such an ineffective communication style that they are blocked out before their message can ever be received. Other people share little or no common ground, and therefore are unable to create common meaning despite their efforts. Look at the comments section of an article on politics or religion and you will see a lot of noise and very little substance being shared.
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When I talk to people about my decision to hike the Pacific Crest Trail, the first thing they usually want to know is "why?" After all, it is really the only question that they cannot answer with a little research of their own, and also because it is the question that they know will generate the most interesting/controversial answer. Providing a satisfactory answer has been difficult, in part because I never stopped to ask myself why I wanted to do it (I just knew I did) and partly because very few people can understand and internalize the responses I do give. In preparation for the PCT, and in light of the fact that I am keeping friends and family updated via blog, I thought that now would be a great opportunity to explore some of my own motivating factors.
1. Nature
Ever since I was a kid I had nature readily accessible. At the end of the street was a creek that always held new sights and secret areas to explore. When I got older I would go hiking in the hills surrounding Almaden Valley, or go for a run along one of the many trails nearby. Once I was introduced to backpacking I began to realize how invigorating it could be to extend these short forays into week-long adventures. After roughly 17 years of backpacking, heading out into nature has become an almost spiritual pilgrimage. I have yet to come home from a backpacking trip without having learned something about myself, and I have always wondered what insights I might have if I immersed myself in the wilderness for a longer period of time. The PCT represents an opportunity to see some awesome landscapes, to experience nature as an insider rather than as a temporary guest, and to see what insights might come as a result.
2. The Challenge
I have been accused of undertaking the PCT purely for the bragging rights. Granted, the pride that I would feel at having completed such an arduous trek is a very real and motivating factor. However, bragging rights are nothing compared to the satisfaction of having faced a challenge and succeeded. As a former competitive runner, I am well versed in personal challenges, though I have never undertaken one on such a large scale. I know that there is great reward in pushing myself to the limits day after day, just to see how far I can go. Even physical pain becomes a happy companion, because it is a reminder of the severity of the challenge against which I am still struggling successfully.
3. Psychology
It has been my great fortune have traveled fairly extensively for someone my age. Of the many things I have learned from my travels, one of the foremost is that you never return from traveling the same person as when you left. I always gain perspective on other cultures, or a greater appreciation for my own. Small or large, the bits of wisdom yielded from these travels always seem to make me a better and more balanced person. I have difficulty in capturing all the ways that I hope hiking the PCT will help me psychologically, so I have included some quotes that I feel really hit the mark:
“To my mind, the greatest reward and luxury of travel is to be able to experience everyday things as if for the first time, to be in a position in which almost nothing is so familiar it is taken for granted.” - Bill Bryson
“Adventure is a path. Real adventure – self-determined, self-motivated, often risky – forces you to have firsthand encounters with the world. The world the way it is, not the way you imagine it. Your body will collide with the earth and you will bear witness. In this way you will be compelled to grapple with the limitless kindness and bottomless cruelty of humankind – and perhaps realize that you yourself are capable of both. This will change you. Nothing will ever again be black-and-white.” - Mark Jenkins
“Traveling is a brutality. It forces you to trust strangers and to lose sight of all that familiar comfort of home and friends. You are constantly off balance. Nothing is yours except the essential things – air, sleep, dreams, the sea, the sky – all things tending towards the eternal or what we imagine of it.” - Cesare Pavese
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” - Mark Twain
“Travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living.” - Miriam Beard
“Not all those who wander are lost.” - J.R.R. Tolkien
“Wandering re-establishes the original harmony which once existed between man and the universe" - Anatole France
“The whole object of travel is not to set foot on foreign land; it is at last to set foot on one’s own country as a foreign land.” - G.K. Chesterton
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So now you know the "why." I have worked to recognize what motivates me in this decision, and taken care to communicate it to the best of my ability. Now it is up to you to read, interpret, and internalize.
The Road Not Taken
- Robert Frost
